Parenting in America

Time for a new subject. Parenting, and what I really think about it. First, I'd like to say I have real respect for those parents who do raise their children well, and think about their future in the process. Now, that said lets begin with what bothers me about the current trends in parenting.

Lets start with discipline. Now I know that people think that it is no longer okay to discipline your child by spanking( with an implement other than your hand), and that for the most part we should simply tell them they've been bad and thats that. Well that isn't that. If kids could be told once not to do something than discipline wouldn't be an issue. But you can't simply coddle your children and hope they don't end up spoiled brats. So I think that parents should discipline their kids, but in relation to the offense. If a parent slaps their kid for backtalk, they might not backtalk, or they may strike out in other ways, but it is not relative to the offense, since a little back talk is simply what some kids do. A better way of dealing would be to simply ignore what they say for a while, all of it, or my favorite, take away privileges. Thats right, take em away, let them think on what they did, and then ask them for either written or spoken explanation of their punishment. Not only would that foster the understanding that discipline is fair, but with a reason as well. If after a while they are still doing the same things, well, then maybe a little slapping around is needed. Some people really need the physical threat of violence to keep them under control, at least in the teen years, my brother is a perfect example, without a male in the house that could slap him around, he would get very aggressive with our mother.

Another sore subject for me with parenting, is the idea that having children will some how make life better, or will save a relationship. This is patently untrue. Not only will children not make life better if its not already, it will kill any relationship that isn't truly ready for it. In my opinion prospective parents should be required to get a permit or license for child rearing. There is nothing worse than dooming a kid to repeat their parents mistakes simply for the lack of planning or true caring. I mean I'm sure that most women feel they love their children, or care for them, but the reality is quite the opposite in a lot of cases. What may seem to be done in the child's interest in reality is just an outlet for the mother. Not to mention having misconceptions about raising kids, and preconceptions based upon their childhood. We all want to give our kids what ever we can, but to spoil the child simply because you can just leads to either entitlement or brats. And brats don't always survive the transition to adult hood well.

What it all comes down to is that children are the future, but we load them up with so much of our past and issues, that we are lucky the world continues to work the way it does.